Screaming Kids

Screaming Kids

Okay, maybe I’m just getting old.  Old and cranky… or old and shitty?  Or, am I?  Well, I recently turned 53.  Is that old?  Maybe…  But, probably not… well, to some yes and to others, no.  I saw a television commercial selling life insurance a few months ago and in it they said, “If you are between the age of 49 and 79, you qualify for the senior’s discount.”  So, I guess I’m in the “senior’s discount” category now.  According to that life insurance company, I am old.  Holy shit…

I used to always think that when people get a little older they get a little crankier too.  And, they have a little less patience for other people.  Or, at least other people’s kids!  Yep, that’s me!

Has anyone else out there noticed that for some reason, the vast majority of kids these days seem to be spoiled rotten little brats?  In this rant, I’m talking about little kids… under 5 or 6.  Every goddam time I’m somewhere out in public I see and hear little kids screaming, yelling, hitting or kicking their parents, throwing things, rolling around on the floor in Wal Mart or, basically, having a five alarm freak-out because they want something.  And, they learn fast.  They learn at a very young age that if they want something all they have to do is stage a little kiddie meltdown and mommy or daddy will give them whatever the hell they want.  And, mommy and daddy is where the problem lies, not with the kids.  I actually feel sorry for the kids.

That’s right… I feel sorry for those spoiled rotten little brats.  Why?  Because they’re not being raised properly, that’s why!  I’m sure we all have different opinions on how kids should be raised these days and let’s face it… everyone has their own theories on how to handle this or how to handle that.  I know for a fact that I’m more on the “old school” side of things.  Some of this new age parenting bullshit drives me mental.  Never using any negative words and always being “positive” to ensure we give the child self-esteem.  And, “new parenting” dictates never using the word, “no.”  On and on and on.  Oh, and there’s the “time out chair.”  Come on, really?  When I was a little kid and did something wrong there wasn’t such a thing as a time out chair.  There was my mom’s hand across my smart little ass!  I only got a few swats… that was all it took to smarten me up.  And, no, she didn’t beat me.  A swat or two across the rear end isn’t child abuse.  I turned out just fine and so did she.

I’m definitely not saying that parents should smack their kids.   I was a young dad once… 23 when my first daughter was born and 26 when my second daughter came along.  I remember spanking the first daughter once when she was about three.  Not hard… but, it “corrected” the problem.  I felt kind of bad after because I didn’t know if I had done the right thing or not.  But, at least I did something!  I never spanked either of them after that.  I didn’t need to.  When they stepped out of line I let them know about it.  And, they listened.  I didn’t put up with any crap.

But, what the hell has happened to the vast majority of young parents these days?  It seems that any hint of discipline is simply not an option.  Just today I was at a local mall.  I’m not exaggerating when I tell you that 9 out of 10 little kids were completely out of control.  One kid went ballistic because he couldn’t go on the little kiddie school bus ride… “Arthur, the School Bus,” if I remember correctly.  Of course, within three seconds mom reached into her purse and whipped out a one dollar coin (a Loonie, as we say here in Canada) ) so the kid would stop making a scene.  The screaming and forced tears stopped immediately because the kid got his way.  He knew he was in control of his mom.  He said, “Jump” and his mom said, “How high, Sir?”  Pathetic.  But, at least that gave her a few minutes to check her I phone for text messages.  Jesus Christ!

Another kid, this one, a little girl about three years old, actually threw her French fries at her young dad.  Why, I don’t know.  First question – why is a three year old eating French fries to begin with?  No wonder kids are so friggin’ fat these days… but I’ll save that topic for another rant.  After the flying fries, screaming and crying, what did dad do?  You know what he did.  He went over and bought her some more fries.  If you were there, your first reaction might have been to go over and grab that kid by the neck.  But, if you really think about it, we should think about grabbing that useless father by the neck.  Or, at least kick him in the plumbs and tell him to go somewhere and learn some parenting skills.  I’ll bet Gramma and Grampa could put on quite the clinic.

Raising kids or should I say, training kids is just like training dogs.  A dog will be an out-of-control, useless mutt if you allow it to.  All of the basic obedience and manners a dog must learn, it can only learn from its owner, or its parent.  If you wanted to, you could teach your dog that the word sit means to run like a mad bastard.  You could teach it that if you say, “Let’s go for a walk,” it means to go and lie down.   And, if you don’t mind your dog jumping up on people, don’t train it to do otherwise.  If you want your kids to behave they must be taught to behave by its parent or its owner.  If you don’t want your kids screaming, yelling and rolling around on the floor in the grocery store, they must learn that from you, the parent.  I promise you they won’t learn it from TV…

Hey, how about this for an ingenious strategy?  The next time your kid wants something but you don’t want him or her have it, just say no.  You don’t have to give a million reasons or justify anything.  Just say no!   Who runs the household anyway, you or your kids?  And, never mind all this politically correct “new-age” parenting bullshit where you’re not supposed to ever say “no” or create a “negative environment.”  Use your goddam head!

It’s just so rare that I see little kids that are well behaved these days.  And, when I do, I feel like telling the parents that I appreciate their well-behaved youngsters.  But, if I was ever to do that, they would probably look at me like I had three heads.

No, I don’t hate kids.  I actually really like little kids, as long as they’re at least fairly well behaved.  But, if you are one of these parents that think it’s okay for your kids to be little brats, keep the little pricks away from me!

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